One of the biggest causes of our anxiety and sadness is our belief that things must be a certain way in order for us to be happy. Certain conditions must be met or circumstances realized in order for us to feel safe, secure, happy, or satisfied. These may be different things for different people:
- Being free from conflict or “drama”
- Only doing activities or tasks that we find interesting or enjoyable
- Having a certain amount of money
- People thinking and saying only positive things about us
- Only being around or working with people that we like and find easy to get along with
- Having a particular car or house or boat or cell phone, etc
- Achieving a personal goal for health or success
If these conditions don’t exist for us, we yearn for them and think that we can’t be happy until they do. If these conditions do exist for us, we cling to them and worry that they will pass (which they will). Once a favorable condition does pass, we are saddened and think that now we can’t be happy because it is gone.
The good news is when we live our lives without clinging to the good things or avoiding the difficult things, we can experience a peace and inner satisfaction that is not contingent on external circumstances. We can accept life, good and bad, as it comes and be grounded in our deeper truth. We can enjoy the richness of our life and rise to our challenges with creativity and kindness and equanimity. May it be so!
Have a great week, everyone!